to whom it may concern:

Dear Co-worker:

Please remember we sit in cubicles right next to each other. If you wish to badmouth me (especially by name) and call me foul names it may be best to do it somewhere other than your cube. It would also be best for you to whisper, like people normally do when speaking ill of another. Talking in a normal-loud speaking voice just isn’t done.

I can hear everything you say. So can everyone else. It does neither of us a service.

For one, it makes you look very petty. For two, it takes a small instance that occurred several months ago and retells it with more than a tad of poetic license. Whether or not people know what happened then, I’d venture to guess it’ll still come out with you smelling the worst despite your attempts to make me out to be a villain.

I don’t know why you would do this since it is not something that will help you.