Monday, January 25, 2010

He's Already Happy

Being a parent is frought with small frustrations, not the least of which is unnecessary “assistance” from others.

It’s true, Sasha is going through a rough patch right now. Not only is he in the throws of being two-and-a-half, but he’s trying to dispense with his naptime, has nightmares about the bad monsters and Swiper, and has to adjust to one of his places having a sudden influx of rules where none existed before. It’s not easy for him right now.

But I think we’ve got a handle on it. It’s been pretty good. Every little change sets us back a bit, but once we’ve made a few adjustments we get back to making progress. As I’ve said before, we have a pretty easy child. We are currently again making progress.

Meanwhile someone decided that since they are not experiencing the same success in dealing with him, that WE needed a book on parenting. A book written by an individual who’s methods I tried during earlier periods of Sasha’s life which only made things worse, so I have little confidence that his methods speak to my child. When WE aren’t the ones having trouble bringing things around to how they ought to be.

I do not believe the problem is with Sasha. He’s disciplined, patient, and has a fairly long attention span. Yes, he’s a toddler, but he responds well to our methods. I do not read books on how to parent your child because I find far more success in ‘winging it’ than following what the so-called experts tell me to do (which each time has ended in spectacular failure).

I do not believe the problem is with our parenting. If it were, I don’t think we would’ve experienced marked improvements with our means of dealing with each new issue.

I kind of find the book insulting. It implies that we are the cause and don't know what we're doing.

3 comments:

caramama said...

Hahah! I'm laughing at the title of the post. I totally get it.

How very frustrating to have it implied that you are the problem. As for the "WE" comment... When someone says "we" but I am not on board, I respond with, "Have you got a mouse in your pocket?" Learned that phrase from my hubby.

Cloud said...

Awww, nightmares about Swiper? I'm surprised my toddler hasn't come up with those yet. So far, she just likes for us to pretend to be Swiper, so that she can say "Swiper, No Swiping!" and we can say "Oh, Man!"

I hate it when people make suggestions that are really thinly veiled criticisms.

But I have to admit, I like to read parenting books, because they give me ideas that I can incorporate. I don't think any expert has the one true plan that will work for every kid, but some of them have some good ideas.

Becoming Mommy said...

Cloud,

My experiance with parenting books has me come to the conclusion they should be retitled, "Do the Opposite Of Everything You Read Here" or, alternatively, "Follow Me If You Like Screaming" when it comes to Sasha. Not a single tip worked out. Then my sister uses the same books on her daughter and, voila, they work wonders.

I'm not saying that the parenting books are bad. I'm just saying we've never found one to be helpful.