Thursday, December 2, 2010

How NOT to Succeed in Business

With work resembling the Kobayashi Maru more and more each day, I recently had a lovely break.

I got to spend several days in professional training offsite. I do love my employer’s willingness to let me treat my employ like an odd variety of scholarship. And thanks to way the training went, I had something fun to write about.

Inappropriate business practices

This doesn’t sound fun, but it is. In hindsight anyway.

For example, my training for professional certification was one-on-one. Just me and the male instructor. In a hotel room. No, not a ballroom. We’re talking a hotel room.

Funny because nothing sketchy was going on. If it had, that wouldn’t have been funny.
For example when a former employer announced their new dress code and got to the section that went into what colors, cuts, fabrics, etc. of underwear were permissible. Then added that they’d be checking to make sure we were in compliance. I asked “who’s checking?”

Funny because when they got I was being snarky, they got mad at ME. I wasn’t the one saying
I wanted to see people’s undies.

Or the same company that didn’t understand why I expected them to drop a client who wasn’t paying them anyway and who was behaving very inappropriately to the staff they had supporting him. I sent them the recordings on my voicemail. I showed them the silk lingerie and jewelry. I told them of his showing up at my parents’ house (they were listed). After all, he was the customer (who is always right) and I should just do whatever it was that kept him happy.

I found out a few years ago that their business model didn’t really work for them.

Or the restaurant I worked in that decided to side with those employees who wore special court mandated “jewelry” in allegations of theft rather than those who had sat on the other side of the room during Discovery.

Apparently their business model didn’t work for them either.

I could think of a dozen examples. Most of which are not the variety I can place here.

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