I’m planning a Bachelorette Party.
I’m Sister’s Matron of Honor so it’s up to me to do so. Have it almost entirely set up too. It’s nothing extravagant or potentially embarrassing--dinner and drinks for about 8 people at the local fondue place. I’ve already sent stuff to the restaurant to have the menu set up and what options I’m giving everyone and to have the bill paid for by me. One caveat, though. I’m only paying for a limited number of cocktails per person, with the exception of the bride, Sister. I’ve been stuck with a $300 bar bill for just one person before and that isn’t happening again.
Problem is, there seems to be an issue to some people about the way these things go. For one, I’ve been told our Mother is offended on 3 counts:
COUNT 1: It’s offensive that we are having a Bachelorette Party. Regardless of the fact not a single one of my ideas included anything randy and it was all completely G rated. Actually, she never heard the ideas…she’d already dismissed them without listening as dirty nastiness.
COUNT 2: She will apparently be offended if she isn’t invited, despite the fact that mother’s of the brides aren’t really invited to bachelorette parties. It’s not done. That’s for the Bride to Be, maids, and assorted girlfriends. After all, the Bride to Be is supposed to feel comfortable cutting loose and that’s usually hard to do with your Mom there.
COUNT 3: She will apparently also be offended if she IS invited. Not sure why.
And there’s some other stuff that is going on with our Mother alternatively offering to pay for it, then not, then telling Sister that she’s supposed to, then telling her that it’s the same thing as a Bridesmaids Luncheon, no wait it’s the shower, no wait….
Some of the Maids were concerned when Sister’s much older (and apparently thought of as somewhat wilder?!) sister was planning it. But then when I sent around my list to make sure everyone would be comfortable with the options, they felt better. No mention of strippers, marital aids, or anything that would offend anyone’s sensibilities. Everything had the option to be sober even, if they wanted to—or not—and left how wild it got up to the individuals rather than the activity planned.
So, I’m paying for it—at least within reason. I’m leaving it up to Sister to decide whether or not Mom is coming (but happy to be the Bad Guy if she says ‘no’). And we’re going with the option from my list of very ‘nice’ outing options that the Bride chose herself. I helped her with the finer points of pre-wedding events and what they were, traditionally who’s responsibility they were, and so on. She felt better knowing what was going on and what was appropriate. It was better for her too as it was no longer too much.
Personally, I don’t know why anyone would be offended by the idea of Fondue. It’s not scandalous. I think actually that there’s a movement away from the traditional baudy event to something that people actually have more fun with.
I guess maybe if you're very passionate about being Lactose Intolerant.....